Happiness is…

… a UPS delivery of handmade truffles from your personal chocolatier!

If you have a Trader Joe’s within a 50 mile radius, you might not want to read this post.

Because if you do, you will have access to legal crack cocaine, and you may never live a normal life again.

Trader Joe’s Espresso Pillows
Crunchy Toffeed Espresso Bits Covered in Dark Chocolate

This here is some good shiznit. Note:

Toffee
Espresso
Dark Chocolate

This little tin, innocent though it may seem, will lure you in with its siren call. You peel off the plastic, pop the lid, and plan to eat “just a few.” “Just a few” turns to ten, which quickly turns to twenty. Before you know it, the tin is empty and your belly is filled with crunchy toffeed espresso bits covered in dark chocolate. Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

They’re so tiny that you don’t get too worried until you realize your “just one more” or “okay, two more” has become a full-fledged sugar rampage.

I finally had to hide the bits that were left under three boxes of green tea, but I don’t think that will really stop me. I might need an intervention.

Generally speaking, I’d say I’m relatively in touch with my hippie side. I recycle religiously. I air dry most of my clothes. I unplug my electronics. I love wheat germ and oat bran. I even tried to eat a hemp dinner roll once, but it was so bad that we threw the whole batch out the window for the birds.*

HOWEVER. There is one hippie thing that fills me with unreasonable RAGE. It’s the kind of anti-hippie fury that makes me wonder if I was a Republican in a former life.

Açaí berries.

Oh, sure, they have a bunch of cool accent marks. And yeah, Oprah pimps them. But to me, they represent all that is unholy about the health food movement. TRENDY FRUITS! Foods should not be trendy! Foods should not need celebrity endorsements! Foods should not be added to other foods for the sole purpose of making health claims!

Between açaí and goji** berries, I’m at my wits’ end. If I ever see a box of Cap’n Crunch’s Crunch Berries proclaim “Now with Açaí!,” I might grab the nearest box cutter and hack up the entire cereal aisle.

* Birds won’t touch hemp rolls, either.
** Heh, heh. Turns out goji berries are really called WOLFBERRIES. Not so cool now, are you, WOLFberries? Actually, I take that back. I’d totally go for something called a wolfberry.

Do you know what today is?

It’s Dr. Seuss’s birthday!

Do you know what my mom, creative person that she is, decided we should make for dinner?

Green eggs and ham!

Best $2.39 spent:

Thanks, Trader Joe’s!

Best rediscovered hobby:

This is practically the only thing I’ve ever bought from Michael’s without a 40% coupon! That’s how much I loved it! These fantastic stamps inspired me to dig out my rubber stamping supplies, wipe off a decade’s worth of dust, and get crazy with embossing powder!

Best thing since eBay:


ETSY! Love, love, love miniature food!

Best February tradition:



The annual trip to the Orchid Show!

Last thing eaten: A Ferrero Rondnoir dark chocolate truffle.
Last song sung: The soundtrack of a Jane Fonda workout tape. Long story.
Last book read: Breaking Dawn. I still can’t believe I read a teenage vampire romance saga, but it was strangely compelling.
Most recent personality quiz result: ISFJ.
Celebrity ISFJ: Jane Fonda.
Alan’s most recent personality quiz result: ENTP, the exact opposite of mine.
Best thing to look forward to: Celebrating Cupcake’s birthday with her tomorrow!