While browsing The Internets, as I do on rare occasions, I couldn’t help but notice this banner ad.

“Lip balm that counts as a half serving of FRUITS OR VEGETABLES?” I thought to myself. “How stupid is THAT?”

The more I thought about it, though, the more I realized it was a good idea. “Well, I don’t really eat many fruits and vegetables,” I mused. My dietary habits are more along the lines of a-fistful-of-Tostitos-draped-with-American-cheese-slices (microwaved on high for 15 seconds, for those of you with gourmet tastes like mine). I can use all the help I can get.

Then I scrolled down.

I never claimed that I was very smart.

SAMPLE ORDERED!

ChapStick: Call me! I have this great new idea for a lip balm with nutritional supplements!

The last week, I’ve suffered from a major case of SPS, or Slumber Party Syndrome. At about 1:00am, I start getting really antsy, and instead of going to bed, I stay up until 2:00am and veg out to blogs, Flickr pools like Pretty Organized, and things that will only hurt me later, like watching Britney’s performance at the VMAs and finding “Gimme More” on infinite loop in my head. For DAYS. It’s like I’m jetlagged in PST or something.

I just watched most of Merlin Mann’s “Inbox Zero,” WHERE HE REVOLUTIONARILY ADVOCATES THE DELETING OF EMAILS. Crazy, right? Right now I have 411 emails in my inbox, 221 of them marked as unread, because I always meant to reply to them, but instead of replying to them, I let them fill me with a sense of guilt every time I open Outlook Express.

Going away on vacation this summer really ruined me for email, because after several weeks of computer-free existence, there was nothing more loathsome-sounding than checking my email. (Or updating my website! Oops!) Now I’m afraid to check it because it’s been so long since I’ve replied to anyone that I’ve probably alienated my entire social network. (For an extremely appealing escapist fantasy, you might want to read about declaring email bankruptcy.) But now it’s 2:08am and I should probably not embark on a mad fit of email trashing, much as I’d like to.

Anyway, the whole point of this post is to announce my

Writing to you from the land of pillow fights, ghost stories, and the inevitable busting out of the Ouija board,
SPS Kiki